The following is a couple different points of view. I thought they were very nice but ultimately, it's possible they may be deleted. However, I didn't want to lose them entirely, so I am sharing them with all of you.
As Master Pierson watched her dancing around the ballroom, he felt as if he was slowly letting her go or perhaps it was she who was slipping away. He was the teacher who could watch the fruits of his labor coming to fruition or perhaps he was someone who had picked up a baby bird from the ground, fed and cared for it and now was watching it take its first flight as a strong and healthy . . . hawk. He had to smile at the picture he had just created in his mind; she had been a tiny baby sparrow and she had grown up into a fine strong hunter.
****
Francis watched her too. He had always been surprised by the bold young lady who was brave enough to not only dress as a man might with delightfully surprising results, but to have taken up the sword with such skill. He knew very well that she had saved his life that afternoon in the alley, but what he witnessed then, paled in comparison to what he had seen since. It hadn’t been much; just the one event in Toledo and then here in Mayrit, plus some practices, but the depth of her skill had expanded tremendously since those early morning exercises in his courtyard. A learned man might see poetry in the written word, but a fighter saw it in the skilled perfection of the sword; what she did lifted the written word from the page and gave it a life attainable only in the imagination of the innocent.
1 comment:
Very nicely done, Anna. I loved your last line.
Post a Comment